Does anybody have any good bioinformatics jokes/puns? I need to a few for a presentation and was wondering if anybody had any funny ones!
Gene Regulation:
Why did the gene go to therapy?
It couldn't express itself.
(GPT 4o)
https://x.com/FedeBioinfo/status/1544623300051091457
In bioinformatics introduction lectures, I like to say that Excel came before Tinder... in seeing everything as a potential date
When you're starting with #bioinformatics, you will spend 3 hours writing a script for a task that could have been completed in 30 minutes with an appropriate existing tool. Later, you will spend 3 hours searching for a tool to avoid 30 minutes writing an appropriate script.
— Monika Cechova Mich (@biomonika) March 24, 2022
When you're starting with #bioinformatics, you will spend 3 hours writing a script for a task that could have been completed in 30 minutes with an appropriate existing tool. Later, you will spend 3 hours searching for a tool to avoid 30 minutes writing an appropriate script.
@ZaminIqbal @DNAntonie Real bioinformaticians don't read paper - Github README.md is surely enough.
— Torsten Seemann (@torstenseemann) July 5, 2015
Real bioinformaticians don't read paper - Github README.md is surely enough
1 vs chr1™
— Karyn Meltz Murphy (@karynotype) March 22, 2016
Slowing down #bioinformatics since 2003.
1 vs chr1 Slowing down #bioinformatics since 2003.
No, bioinformatics efficiency is defined by time faffing around installing dependencies.
— Nick Loman (@pathogenomenick) November 9, 2017
No, bioinformatics efficiency is defined by time faffing around installing dependencies.
What's the difference between mapped bam and unmapped bam formats?
Unmapped is close to mapped, but no CIGAR.
What are the three most common causes for programming errors?
Bad variable names, and one-off errors.
"Close but no cigar" is a (primarily at least) British saying meaning you almost achieved something/completed something but didn't quite make it.
I don't know if I'm right on this, but I've always assumed the origin of this is because people will often smoke a cigar to celebrate a 'victory', so if you don't quite get there, you don't get your celebratory cigar.
I assume people are familiar with why CIGAR is a bioinfx pun
Why should you marry a bioinformatician? They know how to merge and commit.
Three programmers sit in a bar and start arguing about who works with the oldest code.
The first one says, "I use C! It's been around since more than 50 years!" The second one laughs and replies, "That's nothing. I code in COBOL, which dates back to 1959!" The third programmer smirks and says, "Oh please, I work with Fortran. My language is so old, it almost predates the computer!"
A bioinformatician sitting at the neighboring table, overhearing their dispute, looks up from his laptop, gives them a stern look and chimes in: "Gentlemen, can you please take your argument outside? I still have some DNA to analyze!"
A small group of machine-learning experts and another small group of computational biologists are taking the same train to a conference. Much to the surprise of the machine-learning experts, the computational biologists only bought a single ticket. When the conductor comes around, the computational biologists quickly squeeze into the bathroom and slide the ticket under the door. The machine-learning experts are impressed and decide to use the same trick on the return trip.
On the way back, the machine-learning experts are baffled to see that the computational biologists haven't bought any tickets at all. When the conductor enters the coach, the machine-learning experts quickly hide in the bathroom. One of the computational biologists follows them, knocks on the door, and says in a deep voice, "Ticket please!" As the machine-learning experts slide their ticket under the door, the computational biologists take it and head off to a second bathroom.
And the moral of the story? It never harms to truly understand the methods before applying them!
Not bioinformatics strictly per se but:
What do incels and Excel have in common?
Confusing things for a date.
Here are some bioinformatics jokes for you:
I hope these bring a smile to your face!
(Source: GPT 4o)
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